I can’t hear you any more

Something I hear quite often from the grieving parents and children I work with is that they can’t remember what their loved one sounded like.  They have plenty of pictures and other mementos, but they are missing a voice.  I’ve seen children become quite upset by that, as if their parent will be truly gone only when they are no longer heard.

A voice.  Something we take for granted until we no longer hear it saying, “I love you.”  Or telling a story or joke.  Or helping you talk through a troubling time in your life.  Or giving you encouragement when you need it the most.

The quality of a voice.  How it sounds when a person is getting sleepy, or excited, or happy or sad.

If you would like to have a voice to remember, here is a wonderful article on “Grief and Oral History” to get you started.  Or you can visit StoryCorps for some good ideas of recording your own family’s voices.  Start now before your world becomes too silent.

Many hugs!





10 Replies to “I can’t hear you any more”

  1. I was shocked when I heard my mother’s voice after 20 years. My sister came across some videos that they had taken when my mother was still alive. Both of us didn’t remember our mother sounding like that.


    1. That’s an interesting comment. Did hearing her voice bring back any memories, or allow you to recall things in a different way? Did it evoke any specific feelings?


  2. I don’t even have pictures of my mother. Lost them all in a house fire many years ago, I still remember her face though. Sometimes I wish I was an artist so I could paint her face.


  3. A few months after my husband’s death, my daughter found an old video on her phone of her dad/my husband when they were joking around. That is almost more precious than photos. It is their voice that seems to be so important when you get to that point that seems it is all so unreal, making you wonder if it was all a dream.


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