(Note: no turtles were harmed in the writing of this blog.)
Are you feeling stuck? You know the feeling…. like you’re in a rut and can’t seem to get out. You wind up with the same crummy relationships. Or maybe you are in a job that is not fulfilling. Or maybe you have given up on your dream of going to Europe. Or finishing your degree. Or… the list is endless.
No matter how you try to motivate yourself, at the end of the day you are still in the same place.
You kick yourself for being lazy. You berate yourself for your lack of discipline. You feel like a real idiot when you can’t figure out why you aren’t moving forward, even with the things that are most important to you.
You spend all your energy dancing with the Should Monster. You know the Should Monster, that annoying fellow who sits on your shoulder and repeats that litany of all the things you should have done, should be doing.
I’m here to tell you to lighten up on yourself. You are stuck in grief and don’t even know it.
“But, wait”, you say. “I haven’t had anybody die on me. How can you claim I’m in grief? You don’t even know me. You haven’t heard anything about my life.”
True. But I know something you don’t.
Grief isn’t always about death. But it is always about loss and how we deal with loss. And we all have losses, many of which we haven’t dealt with all the way. We’ve become emotional hoarders, mental packrats, hanging on to all the bits and pieces of our lives.
To be continued…
There is a word I use all the time that scares people. I wish I could say it right now, but I’m afraid that if I even hint at it you will run away. I know, because I’ve seen people freak out when I say it. I watch them turn pale and get those deer-in-the-headlight eyes. I can see that they’re looking for an escape route. But I have to say it, so here goes. Stay calm and keep reading. It’s not nearly as scary as you think. Continue reading “The Scary G Word”
It’s my turn to tell you about why I’m a part of the Grief Recovery Institute, and why I am doing this work.
Through the Grief Recovery Method, we talk about our own experiences of grief and loss. That’s where the magic really happens. People see us and how we’ve gone through it, have been there, but even though our experiences might have been different from theirs, they know that we know the pain of grief.
There is a way to go beyond that. And to get the magic back in your life. To get the feeling… “I really like this life.”
There’s life beyond loss. Yes, it changes your life. Sometimes hugely. Sometimes not. But it’s still loss. It just matters what you do with it. If you work the Grief Recovery Method, you’ll have your own stories about how you got your life back. You’ll learn how to deal with losses in your life. We all have them.
Today we all feel so isolated and so alone. It’s wonderful to see people who can talk about their experiences, and smile, and be happy, when people hear our stories it gives them hope.
A lot of times you just need somebody to listen without judgment, someone who just lets you talk. Someone who can be a heart with two ears.
That’s why I do this work.
It’s fun to see the life come back.
That little spark when they realize they aren’t alone.
That’s what the Grief Recovery Institute is all about and just think, I am a part of it.
This is part of Travel With Intent, Six Word Saturday.
Eight years ago I put an intention out into the Universe that I wanted to spend the rest of my life working with grieving people. Some people thinks that sounds pretty cracked (or, as one person playfully suggested, like I’m on crack), but working with people in grief and seeing them begin to heal is so amazing, so magical. It’s the most meaningful thing I’ve ever done in my life.
At the time I was working with grieving children between the ages of five and eighteen, watching them adapt to the changes forced on their lives, seeing them grow and start to smile again. Years later I started working with the adults in their lives. But even in the first months of helping to run grief support groups, I was hooked. I knew what I wanted.
The years went by and I needed to keep my day job and pay the bills while we dealt with Cee’s health crises, but I never lost that intention. And now it’s time to realize it. Cee is healthy and ready to take this new journey with me. This is my passion, and I look forward to the time when I can quit my day job and do this full time. But for now, we’re starting our private practice, nurturing it, getting it ready to support us in our “retirement” years.
To help people who are grieving, all you need is a loving heart and the willingness to listen without judgement, without comment, without censure. Just be a heart with two ears. They want the feeling of loneliness to go away, to not feel so isolated.
One month ago, Cee and I were certified as Grief Recovery Method Specialists, and I started to live in my passion. There is so much need in the world for someone to listen. I am glad I can be that person.
Love and many hugs,
From time to time I will be posting posters that I make up from my own photography. I hope you enjoy them.
If you’ve come looking for my old blog, 61 Musings, it’s been retired. I had run out of things to say. Cee and I are using that space in the blogosphere to start a whole new site, devoted to our new Life’s Work. Yes, we’re starting something brand new (to us) that we’re really, really, really passionate about.
We’re going to help people who are feeling stuck in life, in relationships, in their careers, or even in their spiritual growth figure out why they’re stuck and teach them an effective way to move beyond. We’re helping people create a happier life for themselves.
So stay tuned as Cee works her artistic magic on the format of this site. We’ll be adding content over the weekend that we hope you find interesting. Join us here at Cee-Chris.com. Stay calm and don’t worry, Cee will still be hosting her photography site. All those wonderful challenges, and Share Your World, will still be there.
We have a lot to talk about, my friend!